I honestly have no idea what to do right now. I feel so lost. I dont know why. okay I admit, I miss dance.it was the only way to really express my feelings and i cant do that anymore. but if i do dance team again, then i will have to quit being a football team manager. it doesnt really seem like a big deal but it really is. being around girls is so drama filled i cant handle it. but being around all my brothers for their senior year can be such a blessing. the reason why ii say “brothers” is because my actual brother is on the football team and all his friends are too. i have known them all since i was seven years old and the fact that i have one more year with them is shocking. i am just now realizing how no one will be bothering me when im home or eating all my food… i used to get pissed at that but it will be so fucking different when they all go to college and i dont see them. we would all fight like siblings and they would put up a fight to any guy that would hurt me and they are so protective over me. whats going to happen when youre all gone? ill tell you, ill be alone and bored. :(

so what do i do? dance or spend one more year with my brothers?

heres the thing, you were the healthiest realtionship i have ever been in and thats why i still like you. i know im not the best girlfriend but i tried harder than you did. i mean, you just gave up. you always told me to never give up on someone but what happend? you lost hope in us. we had a thing since new years. then you just completly forget about everything we had. seriously everything reminds me of you. it sucks to go through my day having a great summer then just suddenly remembering something about us.. it makes me sick to my stomach when i see your face or see you name. is that a bad thing? what is that supposed to mean? maybe i shouldnt of let you go, but maybe this is for the better. either way i want to find out soon because i am sick of being hurt. when you gave me your bracelet back, should i have begged for you back or just walked away like i did? i walked away because i didnt want you to see me so god damn weak. the thing that probably hurts the most is that you left me then you moved on right away. did you even like me at all? did you even care? what happens to relationships? who changes? me or him? or the people around us? i just dont understand anymore. all i want is to feel your kiss just one last time. thats all i ask. please.

-andy

relationships suck. they really fucking suck.

apples-are-rubbish:

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(Source: randomness-is-epic)